I’m 28. I’ve been a legal adult for 10 years. Practically however, I’ve been an adult for only a fraction of that time. I oscillate between things I think adults do and things I’ve been doing my entire life. Here are 5 pseudorandom observations about adulthood.

1. The phrase “You’ll understand when you’re older” is a cop out

There are things I understand now that I didn’t understand when I was younger. A lot of things however, were just not explained to me. I think we conflate a younger person’s disagreement with misunderstanding. We assume our greater accumulation of time equates to more wisdom.

2. The status quo is not the way it has to be

Some adults don’t realize the power they have individually and collectively to change the things around them. Many things don’t have to stay the way they are. You can be deliberate in carving out the life you want. With practice, your discernment with regards to what you can change will get better.

3. Any skill you struggled with as a child can be retried endlessly until you die

There is no time limit on learning. Many people struggle with math growing up. You can try again, from scratch. You might discover that you love it.

4. Embarrassment and shame are normal, weird, limiting, and largely external emotions

I need you to realize that if something embarrasses you, that feeling doesn’t originate from you. It starts with how you perceive other people will perceive you. Perhaps you had someone be critical of how you present yourself so you’re embarrassed by a physical trait. Perhaps you were ostracized or witnessed someone be ridiculed for a hobby that you enjoy. In most modern scenarios, I’ve noticed it’s a pointless emotion to entertain.

5 No emotion is inherently bad

To illustrate, let’s look at some that get a bad reputation.

Jealousy

Jealousy can clue you in to things you may desire in your life. When’s the last time you were jealous of something you cared nothing about?

Anger

Anger can clue you in to things that you are not okay with. It can fuel action in very appropriate scenarios such as self-defense, exercise, and introspection.

That’s it for now. I’m sure I’ll learn more in my next adult cycle. For now, I’m gonna rewatch some Danny Phantom.